More Than Just Facts and Pictures

I'm having a bake sale fundraiser this week for my trip to Uganda and have been making a display board to show what is happening in Uganda and my reason for going there. To make this display board I printed out pictures and facts to put on my board and while working on it I became so overwhelmed with feelings I ended up sitting on my bedroom floor in tears. It was one of those moments when reality just smacks you in the face.

Here I am putting facts and pictures of little kids on a board... and over in Uganda kids are starving to death, over 2.7 million children (1 in every 3 kids between the ages of 5 and 17) are forced into hazardous child labor, children are surviving from what they find in garbage dumps, over 3 million orphaned children living in the streets and ghettos- many in abusive circumstances, 2/3rds of Uganda's entire population is under the age of 15... these are facts I'm writing on paper and pasting on a board. But they are more than facts. They are more than pictures. It's reality.

It's real kids, with real names. It's not just statistics. It's little Esther and Daniel who live in the garbage dump, Josephine who starved to death and her brother who died from drinking contaminated water, Patrick who was kidnapped and forced into being a child soldier who had to kill his family as the "initiation process", Julian and Ronny are seven and nine years old and are forced into child labor that is hazardous to their health... do you get it? Do I get it? These are REAL kids, who live REAL lives, with REAL names! They aren't statistics. They aren't another number. They aren't just a face in a picture. These kids are as real as you daughter as real as your little brother. Not only are these kids in desperate, deprived situations and forced into things that are unimaginable but they are devoid of hope. The hope of Jesus that you and I possess.

It just doesn't feel right to treat them as just another statistic, just more kids in another country who have it worse off than we do. It's time to do something. How can we stand and look at this and then walk away and live our normal life? How am I going to go to Uganda and and see it even more real than I do now, how am I gonna walk on the streets, see the faces, talk to them, hear their names, learn their stories and then come back and live my normal life? I think this may be some of the feelings that you have that nobody warns you when you go into missionary life. But I have to say I have never had a deep, heart wrenching passion for something so strongly as I do for this.

The only answer I know is that where God leads I will follow and where He sends me I will serve. I have a feeling that this will not be the only time I spend in Uganda.

~Until every child hears His name.

Behind Bars

Have you ever been in prison? Do you know what it feels like? Do you know how you can be freed from the bondage you are in? I know what it's like. I've served time in prison for years. The one very important fact that I don't want you to miss... For all the time I've served behind bars, I never realized that the judge who convicted me had no right to condemn me. I missed the One in the courtroom who could help me. The one who could stand before that critical, condemning judge and claim me innocent and free.

I believe that prison is more then just being locked up in a physical building. The first definition of prison according the Merriam Webster dictionary is "a state of confinement or captivity." There are so many people out there who are locked in prisons behind bars and don't even know it. The prison is in our minds. It's a battle fought within. I will tell you that is a very lonely place to be. How do I know? Cause I've lived there for years. The first step of breaking out of prison and living in freedom is realizing and acknowledging that you are locked up. As well as who convicted you, who gave your sentence to you and who is the One who can free you. That is what this post is about and will be the first of many on this topic.

In today's world people are locked up in a vast assortment of prisons and at different stages of breaking free. Some people are oblivious to the fact that they are locked up. And these are the stages I have found to be the steps to take to find and claim the freedom that we have in Christ.

1. Recognize that you are confined.
2. Acknowledge that you are confined.
3. Want to break free from the confinement.
4. Seek help.
5. Work through the steps to become free.

I could talk forever on this subject and on various different levels. Of the six points I have listed I have been through every level. To be completely honest I am at many different levels right now in different areas of life and in this post I'm trying to just touch on the first two points.

For people like me who have lived their whole lives running from their problems and struggles in life, I can tell you with certainty that one of the hardest things you may ever do is to recognize that you have deep issues in life that you need help to work through. We tend to be very independent people and proud people at that. We love to give off the impression that we have it all figured out. That we have our life together. We fail to realize that when we do that, the person we harm the most is ourselves. By failing to recognize our struggles we deny ourselves the help that could lead to such freedom in our lives. We all have our own personalized struggles and our own reasons why we struggle to recognize that we are confined that keep us from reaching out for help.

There are issues that many of us struggle with and I have struggled with a lot of them personally, and again there are many reasons why these struggles come into our lives. Some of them are because of choices and mistakes we have made and some of them are simply because we were in the wrong place at the wrong time and somebody took advantage of that. All those dark secrets that we keep hidden that drag us down. All those bad choices that we don't want anybody to know about because we are afraid that they will think less of us because of it. The hurt we've experienced when other people take advantage of the power they have to hurt and abuse others. The addictions that keep us bound in chains of shame yet we can't stop. You get what I'm talking about right? I'm sure things in your life have come to your mind while you've been reading this.

What are you in bondage to? Who has convicted you? How long have you remained in prison while the answer to freedom has been standing by waiting for you to reach out for that help? Before you can break free from prison you have to realize that you have been locked up. I think that is one of the biggest things that holds us back from freedom. We don't even realize that we are in prison. And that prison is our mind.

I'm not worth it. I'm not good enough. I've made too many mistakes. I've hurt somebody. I've made bad choices. I was sexually assaulted. I have sinned. I struggle with addiction. I wasn't worth somebody's time. I was abused. I gave up. I have done things to harm myself. I ran away. I didn't want to live. I have an eating disorder. I have lied. I have stood by and done nothing. I have been disobedient.... I am a child of God's and those things may be part of my life, but they ARE NOT my story.

Can you relate? I'm not sure there is anybody can read that list who can't relate to at least a couple of those things. You probably have many of your own that you could add. Those are the things that we keep buried. Things we hide down inside because of shame and fear, maybe of losing our pride, being rejected, being stigmatized, disappointing those who see us in a different light, afraid of ruining our reputation. Maybe fear that if we actually acknowledge those hard things that we have been through or are going through that we will see how broken we are.

This is step one. Recognize that you are confined, held captive, chained down, in prison, kept in bondage. Acknowledge your mistakes, your choices and the things that have happened to you that hurt. You cannot break out of prison if you don't realize that you are locked up.

So it's gonna be scary. Hard. Some nights, or many nights you will want to give up and just live in the confinement because you've lived there so long that at least you have become comfortable there and you don't have to step out and do the hard, scary uncomfortable things. If you choose to stay in bondage you will never experience the freedom that was intended for you to live in.

I certainly don't have all the answers. I can only tell my story. Share what I've learned, tell of the testimony of what God has done and hope that there is somebody out there somewhere who is helped by it. I pray that through these blog posts you get to see a glimpse of what God has done and is doing in my life. I pray that you will get to see a glimpse of His amazing grace that triumphs over all my fears and failures and hope you get to live that in your life as well. Share your testimony. Share what God has done in your life. Sit back and watch what God can do with your crazy, insane, messed up story. :) Praise God that He's not done with us yet!!

"Lord, I pray that everyone who reads this post realized and acknowledges the areas in their life in which they are living in prison. I pray that those who are your sons and daughters start to find the freedom in you as they reach out for help in overcoming the bondage they live in. I pray that you will work in their lives as they seek you and draw them near and that we can all experience the true freedom in which you have provided us all with. For the lost who don't know you Lord they are in real prison destined for an eternity in a bondage more tragic and real than we could ever even imagine and I pray that as they seek freedom from the bondage in their life that they will realize that the only true freedom comes from you and your son who died on the cross so that we could be forgiven of all our sins and live in the grace and confident hope in the eternal life we have with you. Thank you for working continually in my life and helping me learn what true freedom is and that I can live in that free of all Satan's convictions that hold no charge over a child of yours. Thank you for your unfailing, never ending love, grace and mercy. In the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, Amen."

~Kriss